Life..a limited warranty

The Clapper as used to control a table lamp
The Clapper as used to control a table lamp (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
shitting dog
shitting dog (Photo credit: barnism)

Free for a limited time?

...bad toileting and bad thoughts
…bad toileting and bad thoughts

Tell me who doesn’t just out and out despise that? Why would you try say, a memory foam mattress for a limited time? Who gets it when it is done being used and abused…as it certainly would be in my house. My dogs think the bedroom is one big bouncy house. Well, I suppose after 11 years of marriage, someone should use it for what it’s made for.
How ’bout limited time only? What the hell is that? Proactive the product itself has been on sale for a limited time only for years. Is there a statue of limitations on limitations?
I believe that the following should be free trial offer:
1. Jaguars. Try ’em for a month…If you’re not completely satisfied just haul it, pull it or tow it back to the dealership. No questions asked.
2. Jobs. The little guy or gal not the employer should have the chance to say, Yah or Nah. Go in, make a mess of things, stir up the drama pool and if the shoe doesn’t allowed to say, take this job and shove it.

flushable? (Photo credit: NapaneeGal)

3. Gas should definitely be on the limited free trial offer. Give premium a shot. If the old 98 Dodge Ram doesn’t ride any better than on junk fuel after 1,000 free fill ups. Have to option to hand the Shell card back and possibly give Ultra unleaded a shot for another free limited trial offer.
4. Life is and always should be a free trial offer. If after 46 years of believing in the direction your misguided life has been going, you hit a midlife crisis. Rub the magic lantern, click your heels three time and say, I want to be Sarah Palin, I want to be Sarah Palin, I want to be Sarah Palin.
When the smoke has lifted and the skies have cleared you will find yourself wondering where Russia is and believing in shooting innocent little animals as an art form.

Sarah Palin - Barbarians
Sarah Palin – Barbarians (Photo credit: smiteme)

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