Days Like This

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https://whitewhoppie.files.wordpress.com/2019/04/water-rain1.mp3

 

piggy piggy piggy

Welp…my Mama told me there’ll be days like this…

  1. When it’s not always raining there’ll be days like this. 
  2. When there’s no one complaining there’ll be days like this. 
  3. When everything falls into place like the flick of a switch. 
  4. When you don’t need to worry there’ll be days like this. 
  5. When no one’s in a hurry there’ll be days like this. 
  6. When you don’t get betrayed be that old Judas kiss there’ll be days like this. 
  7. When you don’t need an answer there’ll be days like this. 
  8. When you don’t meet a chancer there’ll be days like this. 
  9. When all the parts of the puzzle start to look like they fit. 
  10. When everyone is up front and they’re not playing tricks. 
  11. When you don’t have no freeloaders out to get their kicks. 
  12. When it’s nobody’s business the way you wanna live. 
  13. When no one steps on my dreams they’ll be days like this. 
  14. When people understand what I mean they’ll be days like this. 
  15. When you ring out the changes of how everything is…

imageedit_15_5218044899Then I must remember there’ll be days like this

 

Mother Melancholia

Ah, I understand now, alone, a product of ancient Rome

(a black collar, middle class, value family from my generation.)

Generation Catacomb!

WE utter tumors of blood.

For with OUR blood…plug the dykes and the wall still remains

It was there I had seen him first.  An overly clean orderly with distended belly. Apparently, he had many needs to feed his vice.

 

Than…

Oh, Mother Melancholia had been a woman-child of gelled mold.  Obliging, as a casserole.  She had been known for trading a weekend passes just to come in from the cold.

Catacomb Lovers you fill my psyche with only lies.

Broad is a shipwrecked boat in the woods, swinging from a household tree.

Sweaty are the breasts upon cursed, crafty cave.

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I protest to this embankment,

The residents, the freaks, are prepared to overthrow!

No matter how you keep your pansies, well groomed.  No matter the vials for your smiles.  A Pagan Reformer tide…will be coming soon.  Crimson waters will punish your passageway.

..a chastity belt notched around the tombs.

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Are YOU an Eco Friendly Pet Owner

“If I’m off the road and alone…I let him unload!”

That is my ‘earth friendly’ vow as a Pet Owner.

Now I get that shit in the street or snowbank is beyond gross.

**Anyone who calls what comes out of a dog’s ass end…poo!  Is not a true pet owner!

However, three quarters of the state I am in…is rural.  Rural, particularly compared to the trash driven streets of city’s such as, Boston or New York.  But here where the winter chill settles in and plays dirty…I prefer to think of my dog’s shit as…giving back to the earth.

New Hampshire has her ‘old fashion’ politically incorrect hippies, such as myself.  And, she has her L.L. Bean do-gooders who will say Poo Poo on my philosophy.  These well intention-ed, well dressed in earth-wares, persons most likely have the following list of do’s and don’ts when it comes to pet sustainability!

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  • How to Put a Handle on Dog Shit

You could walk all the way back to the car…about two miles as the crow flies.  Tie the bag nice and tight, place it on the floor of your Tesla, drive like a bat out of hell (because the smell is so bad), get a speeding ticket, run up to the second floor of your house to the ‘guest’ bathroom and flush the shit.  The shit that has turned to liquid from the heat of the car.

If you are willing to pay the price…there are water soluble bags for cat litter and dog shit.  This added expense will add to your feeling you have done your best to clean the earth of toileting issues.

  • Do It Yourself Homemade Pet Food

Organ meat is particularly tasteful to the Cat and the Dog.  And, just think of the joy you’ll have when you buy your first organ grinder.

Some say, seafood, oysters to be precise, adds to your furry friend’s sex drive.

  • Do It Yourself Pet Toys

One of the Cat’s favorite toys is my grandmother’s leftover curlers from 1962.  She also enjoys organic catnip in a dirty white tube sock that is knotted up.

I gave the Dog an old shoe years ago!  He loved it.  However, I found myself trying to teach him which shoe is new…and, which one is old.

  • Adopt, Adopt, Adopt

Of course, the most sustainable thing we can do for our health is, adopt a shelter pet.  It is proven that persons who love dogs live longer and happier lives.  The same has been hinted at about cats.   But the Cat is still out on debate on that one.

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A medium-sized dog has a carbon footprint of 2.1 acres, roughly twice the 1 acre for a gas-guzzling sports utility vehicle driven 10,000 kilometres  (6,214 miles) a year… cats occupy the same footprint as a small Volkswagon, while two hamsters equal the same emissions as a plasma-screen television.” – Darcy Matheson, words from her book Greening Your Pet Care.

Two dogs, five cats, leave the carbon, fecal covered, footprint of one melting New Hampshire snowbank mixed with mud…approximately, five feet high and ten feet wide.  Essentially it is enough fertilizer to fill the hole for your casket once the Cat kills you.

#RandomWordbyRuth

 

 

 

Wonder Woman’s Eraser

the blinds of my mind…lilt

a storied plot of disconnect and bad vertical holds fresh with scant static

I interviewed, repeatedly…the main character on merits

on fishbowl houses

and

smiling goldfish with one shoe

I keep coming back to these indoor graveyards

scrutinizing testimonials  from dead poets

at graffiti’s basement of cheap thrills

stirring up banshee’s with last centuries news

I have lit this vigilant firecracker so often just to watch it explode

someone else

anyone else

would have taken a powder by now

but this actor, this skinny cow reminds me

overturned stones eventually turn cold

I will come back at least three times more

first, with a left hand cane to pry open all the good that remains

second, with a stronger back to carry a weighty blind frog

third, with Wonder Woman’s eraser to remove my name

Where Are My Pink Canada Mints?!

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I have literally spent the last two weeks searching for two things:

A mouse pad! That’s right…a simple, useful, device for the desk!

And,

Pink Canada Mints for when I get parched!
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Not too far down the road from this the smallest, big city in New Hampshire is, Revere, Massachusetts.  A lovely high crime city.  It is mostly known as a burial ground for the Southies of Boston.

Side note:  I once spent a night in a mortuary…in a coffin…in Revere.  But that is another story for another time.

Long story short, the Necco company thought it would be cheaper to just close down…instead of removing the ‘scat’ and rodents…discovered within the machines.

So now WE have no more candy hearts, Necco Wafers, Mary Janes and Pink Canada Mints.

How hard is it for some sugar company to pick up the ball and run…with this one?

The loosing of the Malted Milk Balls did not phase me that much.  Though, I do enjoy chocolate Necco Wafers.

But WTF!

Because of my internal hysteria…I have up’d my meds.  So much so that I delusional-ly envisioned my desk with:

  • a boombox
  • cassette tape of ABBA’s greatest hits

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    Roach clip. Metal clip or holder used to hold a marijuana joint, to prevent burning of the fingers.
  • a roach clip with feathers dangling off

and…

  • a jug of Maddog 20/20