I have had many cats over the years. Each one of them have been fastidious in their…potty routine! I took a survey among the felines that live in our happy abode, current day and the response was the same.
“Momma, that funny looking, motorized, cabinet…scares the shit out of us!”
Perhaps, that is what the product was designed to do!
The Mrs has been hanging around on the deck…as of late! We do not know where the Mrs. comes from. But the whole household is aware of the Mrs…
I don’t care cat-attitude!
This sexy and savvy feline has caught the eye of our sometimes…misguided, Bernie.
With the Bern not having opposing thumbs, I offered to put down on paper a personal ad:
I have been tired of my litter-mate! We’d been together almost all of our 9 lives. Like a worn down recording of Stay Cat Strut! One of my most favorite songs! So while she cat napped in the sun, I had my human read me the Cat Scratch Gazette…while I lay in the bed.
And, though my human isn’t the pick of the liter…she did suggest I take out a personal ad
If you like warm milk on a cold night and chasing tail
If you can clean your privates while standing up
If you hold the human race with disdain
If you like making love even after you’re spayed
Then I’m the love that you’ve looked for, write to me and escape
Now cats aren’t made to be followers. We follow our own path. I gave no thought to my old lady. Cats are insensitive and tire quickly of the same old boring routine.
And, lo and behold, the Mrs…though nobody’s poet…wrote back.
Why do you think I keep stopping by your house? Yes, I like warm milk. Yes, my human is stupid. I’m not into Greenies but I am inclined to Temptations. Piss or get out of the liter-box, Bernie! Let’s cut through this red tape. Meet me down by the bird feeder and we’ll plan our escape.
Summer is coming soon and fuck knows…the Mrs will be crowded with admirers. So I strutted with high hopes as she walked about…tail in the air and full of grace.
I knew her smirk in and instant. I knew the curves of her luscious whiskers. It was my own lovely lady. **I’ve been telling the human, at 15 years old…my sight was not that great.
The cool cat, is just standing there. The cool cat, doesn’t even glare. The cool cat, thinks he’s so hot. The cool cat, doesn’t give a snot. The cool cat, doesn’t listen in class. The cool cat, thinks his better than the rest. The cool cat, really has no friends. The cool cat, smokes after school. The cool cat, left his family. The cool cat, is a player. The cool cat, has no prayers. The cool cat, has no savers. The cool cat, is one tough dude. But really…. The cool cat, is one big fool. #Jasmine Aira
I am Brangien [Brangaine] of Weisefort, Ireland, lady-in-waiting to my cousin Isolde, who became promised to King Marc of Cornwall. His nephew Tristan escorted us to England by ship. But Tristan and Isolde fell in love at sea. As ye may know, or will find out, they cite the philter they drank as the cause, over which I was supposed to keep vigil. I would like to share my perspective of how I have created good in the world through my herbs and observations. There is much to tell, including how I have adopted this odd language. In good time. My life is in God’s hands. –Inspired by the modern French translations of the Tristan and Isolde texts