Shake that Healthy Butt

I like big butts and I cannot lie?

WTF News from the newly ordained SSD (stupid is as stupid does) society:

Scientists at the University of Oxford have uncovered evidence that women with big butts are not only the most intelligent, but also the most resistant to chronic illnesses.

Shake that healthy butt! Baby got back!

Women with a big butts, wide hips and a narrow waist can live longer, and even be more intelligent, since the Omega 3 fats stored in their butts support brain development.

comments from the peanut eating gallery:

“Yo, bitch I have a flat ass!  It is more aerodynamic and much better suited for having sex in small places.  You don’t see that Wonder Butt J-Lo winning no nobel prize!”

My Prostate is growing and growing and growing.  Fuck where is the damn toilet?

FREE video reveals Dr. David Brownstein’s 5 Simple Tips
to a Healthy Prostate and an in-depth exploration on why

prostate concerns do NOT have to be an inevitable part of aging.

Prostate Revive Health SupplementWhy wait to pee?   Worry about getting it up at night…not up and out!  Take the natural way out!  Don’t believe me?  Dr. David Brownstein used this remarkably simple and holistic drug not only on lab rats but on his father-in-law!  Now the whole damn family can use the bathroom.

Should holistic and drug be in the same sentence?  Seems wrong?  Therefore, the maker of this info-blog would like to suggest elastic, Poise and drunk nights.  In the midst of a holistic blackout…with an adult diaper on there would be no need to worry about the ‘got to go’ feeling.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P_iWtG6C7gE

ARE YOU A LIPSTICK LESBIAN?

Does your chewing gum lose its flavor round the gay bar at night?

Are there homosexuals everywhere?

Personally, RandomwordbyRuth does not condone stereotyping any gender, group, chat-room and/or misguided organized religion.  However, when visiting the local Gandhi-Mart for further research via the local townies, the following conclusions were made:

1. It don’t matter who the fuck you are just keep your hands off my welfare

*Wendy Butts, Baby Momma

2. Can’t no good come from them getting married.  Pissing all over the fuckin’ family values this damn country fuckin’ fought for!-

*Homer Hung, refugee from Somalia currently working for his Uncle Samid.  Homer currently qualifies for

IMGP6492.JPG
IMGP6492.JPG (Photo credit: Chrysaora)

Obama care and HUD housing.

Where does the time go?  

Next week the following topic will be uncovered and exposed for the silliness it represents:

Does Oral Sex cause throat cancer?

Kid: Your beard’s not real.

Willie: No Shit!It was real, but I got sick and all the hair fell out.

Kid: How come?

Willie: I loved a woman who wasn’t clean.

Kid: Mrs. Santa?

Willie: No it was her sister.

Spanx for the Memories!

Comedy is better than a synthetic drug!

A good bowel movement everyday ensures a richer and longer life.

Bad daily wardrobe mishaps allows for a longer and happier viewing audience.

After forty the thought of sex is nearly as good as the act.

LET YOUR LOVE LIGHT SHINE

And,

singing off note and with total disregard for rhythm in the shower while laughing at yourself as you stand there naked will mean the day will be taken seriously but with several grains of self depreciating humor!

Youngin’ at Heart

Fairy tales can come true, it can happen to you If you’re young at heart. For it’s hard, you will find, to be narrow of mind If you’re young at heart.

You can go to extremes with impossible schemes. You can laugh when your dreams fall apart at the seams. And life gets more exciting with each passing day. And love is either in your heart, or on it’s way. Don’t you know that it’s worth every treasure on earth To be young at heart. For as rich as you are, it’s much better by far To be young at heart.

And if you should survive to 105, Look at all you’ll derive out of being alive! And here is the best part, you have a head start If you are among the very young at heart. And if you should survive to 105, Look at all you’ll derive out of being alive! And here is the best part, you have a head start If you are among the very young at heart.

Lymed Out in NH

May is Lyme Disease Awareness Month
May is Lyme Disease Awareness Month (Photo credit: elycefeliz)

Lyme, Lyme go away…save your bad ass attitude for another day!

The blacklegged tick (Ixodes scapularis), the ...
The blacklegged tick (Ixodes scapularis), the primary vector for Lyme disease in the central and eastern United States. (And elsewhere, too. Uploader) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Every so often when hyperactive people come up for air…the wind is slightly against the sails of their fortitude.  The sunniest of their days seem to be likened more to a childhood daydream than the day’s current lack of progress.

Every now and again, these beings of easily not missed disposable lives.  These earthlings who wish to remain anonymous when it comes to living life with others.  Hermits with no country to call their own.  Distracted by the frays of life’s entanglements with persons who could more or less, not give two shits.

People like me, human’s like you and masters at the art of avoiding the truthfully explicit obvious metaphorical truth…Life sucks you dry if you wonder off the path in join in the human race.  All of US who prefer to just be left alone forget that the key to the cabin that lies in the wooded forest of ‘just leave me the fuck out of it’…realize the affliction is oh, so real and oh, so blatantly a bastard to the devil’s hand maiden…and typically is referred to by others as, Lyme disease.

I had moved about the last month at speeds of enlightened foot and spiritual blunders.  I traveled the route of peaceful undertakings and making my way without attachment to anyone but myself.  Full speed ahead…daydreams and pockets full of lively poetic stories filled my filthy mind.  My base camp had been the human condition #4001:

“Your test results came back positive…you do have Lyme and on occasion will feel muscle aches that begin from the pinky toe and travel so far north…your body will extend beyond pain to a threshold of ruthlessly agonizing remembrances of how it must feel to have ten teeth pulled at the same time without nova cane.”

Doctor of doom will go on to let you in on other lym-e and slimy secrets.  Sleep will become a thing of the past.  Headaches will encourage you to pursue a discount lobotomy at the local down and out mental institution.

The best part Doctor of Doom‘s nurse practioner…Nurse Rachett will tell you as you amble you laden me down in greener pastures body moves slowly to the sanitized by life examination door:

The pills in which you will consider a friend…your white, pink and blue little helpers will make you wish that death had come to visit an offered you a discount rate.

Sometimes, I hate Lyme.  I hate what it does to me.  I despise that I cannot be the hyperactive person I want to believe I can be.  I dread the sickly can’t get up and shake it loose feeling.

In all honesty, I consider my life to be missing a piece of it’s Used to Be over the top but now on sabbatical for an indefinite period of time feeling…a feeling that knows now end.

Lyme…a friend of the devil and unfortunately, a fearful fair weather friend of mine.

 

Thought for a Black Sabbath day

“I don't know, I don't care, and it doesn't make any difference.”  ― Jack Kerouac
“I don’t know, I don’t care, and it doesn’t make any difference.”
Jack Kerouac

When times flies, as it will, intelligent life is circled around less time with stupid people and less time with wasted conversation…with above mentioned stupid people.

 “the only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars.”
― Jack Kerouac, On the Road

It is a mad, mad, mad, mad, mad world aft
er all and it is grower smaller by the minute!

Truth of the Heart

Simple Life for Complicated People…or better put, just living life on life terms!

Imagine all the people Sharing all the world...
Imagine all the people
Sharing all the world…

Saint Francis Prayer:

grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled, as to console;to be understood, as to understand;to be loved, as to love.

Melissa’s Hopes:

There is no magic
There are no secrets
We all begin this race at the start
But I have come this far
With a truth of the heart

the revolution is now
the revolution is now

Deep down inside
I think we’re all the same
Try not to judge someone
And never shame
I do believe that people are good
They just want hope and respect
And to be understood

Sometimes it hard sometimes it’s strange

But the truth of the heart is people can change

Yes there is danger and there are shadows
And there is fear inside the dark
It has powered countries and borne religion
Fear can never rule the heart

My father’s burden
My mother’s rain
My own desire
My sister’s pain
All souls have traveled along this road
Each one has carried their own heavy load

I'm for Hillary 2016
You ask me for a contribution
Well you know
We’re doing what we can
But if you want money for people with minds that hate
All I can tell you is brother you have to wait

John’s imagery:

Imagine there’s no countries
It isn’t hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion too
Imagine all the people
Living life in peace…

Image
First Class People do it in the light of day