You will not catch me sleeping in your shallow grave so wholesome.
Nor napping in the tomb of discontent.
Though the hands do tremble
a victory should be claimed.
without fanfare or extravagance.
In true discourse,
mine not yours,
It used to be…
that I belonged to you
you belonged to me.
So what of the past
picking apart peculiar trips…
set adrift onto different seas.
A clan unleashed in the barren desert
awaiting their ships of plenty…it had been lost at sea.
As siblings we were swaddled in damaged cloth
So I suppose to disrobe the anger…
well, that is all I’ve got.
Humbly I will ask you
Step away from the shallow grave.
Only the ugly becomes more perverse with the tall tales
There are many out there just like me
Walking a lonesome solo path
step by step reconciliation is the only fact.
Brothers and sisters, I stand at the shallow grave…daily
Casting a lucky penny in…
Full knowing I am not without my own sin.
What of these vows we make. Real or imagined. Spoken or, assumed. Promises behind cupped hands.
I still collect…broken things.
My vain attempt at avenging secrets I would rather not keep.
All whimsical obligations.
Random boughs on a trail to somewhere else.
Court ordered family lies.
Often seen in charming disguise.
Ironic, but away from the pledge, I never feared that I would not make it home.
Comfort came with words and song.
I am used to collecting used things.
Marred, scarred, dented.
I built with pride..this broken home.
My brother, my sister,
Outwardly able to live a lie.
Able to forgo…the why.
Still in the darkness of sleeplessness,
their anger cries.
More to a vestibule for the dying
More to the communion
More of obsession’s admiration
More to those who fly
More to those who do not ponder why
Over and above…I keep the gods lowercase
Over and above, the stone dead and gone
Less of a willingness to comply
Less of puppy’s in the window
Less photographic harmony
Less bouncing joy on bended knee
I say, more or less “Let me go”
There is a quiet place, more or less
Oh, sporadic the occasions of an unwanted guest
I put anger in my pocket way down deep…
where as I lion, I hope, it will wane and sleep.
Atop of my head and nuzzled down tight with a knit cap. annoyance is no longer a friend.
I try to hide it behind the saltines and the mean drive by’s in the mind…
Anger’s persistence is not kind.
Into the woods, a daily walk.
Yet, a clandestine obscurity invades what I have not.
I have not the restfulness that wills itself to my soul.
Everywhere, everywhere, barren holes.
I will get to the end of my reach…one of these minutes.
Indignation will put the well-traveled deep…until weathered with forgiveness.
If this, single entity, called forgiveness…
were a book.
It would be open…
amassed with complex, simple and congeal words.
Each letter…sharp as, the finest blade.
Still…the voyage of…forgetting…would not be saved.
I could, we could, the winds could…embody the same chapter…
The same verse…over and over.
Understanding would stand alone…misspelled.
Oh, how I have hoped…to pen the story of a world…
‘giving back all that it took.’
Chapters filled with mended hearts.
A romantic plot where love builds a home.
And, pain is driven be car…
far, far, away.
But vision is lost…current day…in the burning building of thought.
Leaving a closed book…
With hope being accosted.
A victim of high cost.