Somehow I had forgotten that I had been a self appointed AllOut.com member…when time spent in the closet distances itself from self…one takes certain things for granted.
Yet, do we really? Is it okay to be out at work? Perhaps, but perhaps not. Yeah, I can stop hiding my lesbianism but do I really?
My thoughts are this:
Yes, I still avoid telling certain persons about being ALLOUT for it is safer and easier.
I live in a small New Hampshire town who’s population believes that being with a women would be fun to watch but men? No, way! When in standing conversation the term, straight is used, most people in Franklin assume you are just handing out directions.
Tonight a quiet gentlemen had inquired about my ‘boyfriend’ having seen the ring on my finger. Did I deter him from his judgment? No! The time and energy it would take to encourage understanding in the differences between the two worlds we come from was just not on the agenda for the night.
Not too long ago, this had been another scene from another bad plot:
Late one North Carolina warm summer night or possibly early morning, who knows for sure. I and my live in wish you were out of the house, lover had found our keys locked inside the trusty Ford Escort and our lives staring down the barrel of a gun and several wooden baseball bats.
The words ring in my ears to this day. Sentences spilled out from a band of bigoted young men.
“Fuckin‘ dyke, I’ll give you what you need!”
Fortunately, my mouth has be known to get me out of trouble, as well as, in. Not sure what I said but the edge and the depth of the statement had been enough to give us time before a definite bad scene were to occur.
Long story short, the chips on my shoulder were built by the hands of men with short fuses and women with prejudiced minds. I suppose being ALL OUT is an ongoing process.
In ending, there is nothing worse than a lesbian with a cross to bare and a message to send. But fuck, if the times aren’t changing fast enough we must push on through!
Less than 24 hours ago we launched a campaign to get Apple and Google to drop a dangerous app from their stores that thinks it can ‘cure’ people of being gay. The 60-day course tells gay people they are not “born this way” and offers to help find “freedom from the bondage of homosexuality.”
This amazing response came after 37,000 All Out members asked Apple and Google to pull the dangerous gay ‘cure’ app “Setting Captives Free” from their online stores. Google has a great reputation for doing what’s right, if even more of us speak out they’ll pull the app. Will you sign the petition to ask Google to join Apple and drop the gay ‘cure’ app?
No one is out of the woods until we are ALLOUT of the woods!
Today, while I was at work, my sister stole my iPad and tested to see if it can survive a thirty foot drop, just so she can be a youtube sensation. My apple ipad is now broken and she has 83 views. I know this is entirely off topic but I had to share it with someone!
Thirty some odd years ago…my sister who had been given the key to the village of weirdness that stemmed from my younger frame…of course, only when domineering catholic parents were out at play.
Well, my sister who felt it best to rule with an iron fist than to candy coat with Pop Rocks had decided that disciplining my unruly drunken 10 year old behavior with a good spanking of said, leather belt bought but not used to holding up pants, would be the only way to right the wrong. With all the grace that we later discovered she did not have the words of parental control sprang from her lips like the tiny third world wanna be leader she was.
‘This is gonna hurt me more than it’s gonna hurt you but it has to be done…Drop ’em!’
With one swoop of athleticism found only by blind persons playing dodge ball, the big brass buckle fell upon my head not my ass and it was of metal not of leather.
Bleeding from head to toe…lesson learned? Never leave a fool at heart in charge of the card game you will loose every time.
“Sisters are doin’ it for themselves”
Now there was a time when they used to say-
That behind every great man there had to be a great woman
Now in these times of change, you know that it’s no longer true
So we’re comin’ out of the kitchen’Cause there’s somethin’ we forgot to say to you We said, “Sisters are doin’ it for themselves”
Standin’ on their own two feet and ringin’ on their own bells
We said, “Sisters are doin’ it for themselves” Now this is a song to celebrate the conscious liberation of the female state. Mothers, daughters and their daughters too, oh yeah, woman to woman, we’re singin’ with you The inferior sex has got a new exterior we got doctors, lawyers, politicians too
Everybody, take a look around can you see, can you see? Can you see there’s a woman right next to you? We said, “Sisters are doin’ it for themselves,”
oh yes we are standin’ on their own two feet and ringin’ on their own bells, Sisters are doin’ it for themselves Now we ain’t makin’ stories and we ain’t layin’ plans.
Don’t you know that a man still loves a woman when a woman still loves a man?Just a same though Sisters are doin’ it for themselves.
“Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable.” by Woody Allen.
Open the package, Mum, open the package…I want to see what’s inside.
My Adopt-A-Mother told I had been allergic to tampons at a young age. Something to do with my genetic make-up or dirty women wear those filthy things…
Not really sure which.
My concern had been modeling naked?
How would I address that situation?
I don’t want to point out the obvious but if there is no stone to hold back the dam…the waters run free…if you know what I mean.
Now as an adult, I feel I can make those important feminine hygiene product decisions on my own.
I want to branch out. Not scented. Not slender. Not dyed to be toxic. Something simple…
So I came across bio-degradable tampons yet not quite the small triumphant for ambiguous Ambien Grace…As I had hoped.
How is the whole thing done?
You know what it come with instructions!
Must go…there are words I don’t get and need to Google.
One of my readers had sent me a blurb on the effects of Ambien while being alive.
I took note of it and packed it away with the rest of the useless information I receive on a daily basis. Items such as: growing up and how to get there, learning from the past, blowing up balloons to make the United States a safer place and dog training for dummies.
I couldn’t shake one thought however. Could it be a conspiracy by the powers that be? I am not afflicted with ignorance? Have I not laid to waste the lives of so many? Is it not true that my suicidal ideation and borderline tendencies have left many scratching their heads and asking, WTF!
Perhaps, the US government purposely and with malice in the flag of our fore fathers: encouraged white trash trailer bunnies such as my birth Mom to go ahead and fuck everything in sight. And, by doing so, a pile of human waste starting at Lakes Region Hospital, NH, rolled down to Texas, leaving several other Ambien decedents in it’s path.
Like the masons, to which my Adopt-A-Grandpa, Ed, belonged, the society of Tucked Away but Fucked Up Ambien Workers, have infiltrated every unappreciated dumbed down nook in the fabric of our society?
I’ll have to understand more about the words I just wrote. Perhaps, utilize Google and get back to you with an answer on that one.
For now, here’s to volunteering to paint a smiley face on the poor and impoverished, one Ambien Grace stroke at a time.
allergic reaction: hives; difficulty breathing; swelling of your encounter, lips, tongue, or throat. Buy Zolpidem on the internet.
TheCertifiablyTRUERavingsOfASectionedPhilosopher: Don't be afraid to think you might be a little 'crazy'. Who isn't? Check out some of my visualized poems here: https://www.instagram.com/maxismaddened/