It makes me sad…to refer to our fresh kitten as, Demon baby. Yet, as I struggle to tie my shoe…with laces frayed. As I sip my lukewarm coffee because I have just spent the last 30 minutes…running around the backyard, slightly, bare ass. Chasing the Demon baby who happens to be enamored by the squirrel nest twenty feet up…in the old Oak tree. And, with all of that, as I pretend to rest, with tepid coffee in hand. Sipping from a chipped coffee mug. A mug I had managed to keep for several years. Several years of fighting off dogs, adult cats and the ‘wife’! Chipped from a, not aging quickly enough, kitten and his poor judgment.
All of this combined, along with a six month old kitten sticking his ass, and his, intact-ness, in my face…as I attempt to watch the morning news. With all this…nothing compares to the…
‘Did you see Floyd? Quick get the camera. Don’t make any sudden moves. I want to get a picture.’
What attracts the over the edge, always trending Cat Lady, to the obtuse, narcissistic, unrelenting cuteness, of a cat?
A cat can make about a hundred different sounds. Which makes sense. I have never and will never forget the sound a cat delivers…whilst throwing up on the newly purchased furniture.
Both humans and cats have identical regions in their brains that are responsible for emotions.
After the cat vomits on the, can’t afford to replace it, sofa, the same emotion is felt by human and feline..alike. The feeling of ‘WTF is that? Are we missing a bag of pot?
3. 40, ooo people are bitten every year by the ‘favorite’ cat. That being said, it is most likely, the same cat. Year in and year out. Until the favorite cat has moved on to greener pastures at the ripe old age of 30.
4. A cat rubs against people not only to be affectionate but also to mark out its territory with scent glands around its face, body and paws. This would make sense with the, not ready to be neutered, kitten, sticking his male-ness in my face…and, than, rubbing the rest of himself… all over my pajama bottoms. I’ve tried to tell all the cats, …no worries, I am yours. But apparently, they do not trust humans and their emotions.
5. 1/3 of cat owners believe their cats can read their minds!
I believe number 5 thoroughly explains a humans need to be accepted by the cat. Without intention, humans have forced themselves into a harried world. Centuries ago, this had been true. And, it is certainly, fact today.
As I begin my descent from the day.
After being…most likely –
Made fun of
Overwhelmed with petty conversation
Underwhelmed with work
Plugged in and tuned out
After a monotony of nothingness turning into more oblique behavior for the next day. Cat lovers simply crave to have the work done for them. When my cat reads my mind, he is witnessing –
I don’t care if you love me…I love you anyways. You are far wiser than I. Charisma is too plain a word to describe you. Please take me to your leader…I am in need of understanding…without my having to explain why!
TheCertifiablyTRUERavingsOfASectionedPhilosopher: Don't be afraid to think you might be a little 'crazy'. Who isn't? Check out some of my visualized poems here: https://www.instagram.com/maxismaddened/