Typically I save my ranting and raving for more subtle things…poetry, images of trash laid upon Mother Nature’s doorstep…political videos that make absolutely no sense to the common public.
Well, I am going Unplugged and Unedited on an issue that has plagued me and my delicate nature…for decades.
A few days ago, a middle aged woman, good looking yet elusive in dress, entered her local discount goods and gun store for a simple purchase, an inner tube that would pleasure her lady friend whilst they paddled their way around a very secluded and romantic pond.
As is typical, this ancient athlete did not stop to puruse the ‘celebrate it in fashion’ isle. She did not meander near the latest…’you should leave it in the bin because the movie was shit when it first came out’ cheap and easy DVD barrel.
Quick and to the point had been her journey!
Why the upright, brisk and no delay shopping? Our lady of the fashion senseless…knew what she would encounter if she stayed and/or strayed too long near the women’s lingerie or the female hygene with hyginks isle.
She would get what always came about. She would be held captive to ignorance in a blue vest and name tags such as; Dotty, Spike and Lolanda!
‘Thank you sir…and have a good day!’
‘Mommy, that man is in the wrong bathroom!’
I tell you what..Nothing assures me that we have not come that far with equality and grace and acceptance…as the above statements. For as sure as the day is long and filled with ignorance…the media and society alike will grant children and it’s adoring public…images on what it is to be a woman and what it takes to be a man!
I will also tell you…there is no bigger slap in the face for a potentially sexually and identity confused suicidal teen…than the wrong guess, jokingly or sincere..at their gender.
It insures the newby lesbian, transgender, gay male and bi-sexual teen that if society has not quite got a grasp on addressing you as a person…certainly coming out of the closet is the last thing you want to do.
I remember as a teenager. Looking, I suppose, like a Tomboy: dirt under my nails, tan on my shoulders and muscles where girls did not have muscles. I recall those attributes, as well as, the lack of pink items in my wardrobe…I also heard the curious onlookers stating:
‘You can’t go in there…that’s a women’s bathroom’
‘Are you a girl or a boy?’
I cried nights, avoided confrontational situations and let go of the idea that it was okay to be different. I endured horrible days, years and seconds second guessing that indeed…I was just me not a gender!
Little gestures mean so much. Particularly to those who are confused and in need of acceptance. Which happens to be a large portion of young L,B,G,T’s and old, not out of the closest, L.B.G.T’s.
What does it mean to address someone as something they are not?
It means that you are uncertain of who, what and how they are. How they got to that particular juncture in life. And, furthermore, the lack of understanding creates more and more bias.
Take a second…look at the stranger you are addressing. If uncertain…just wish them a good day. It does not really matter if they are a man or a woman. They are just them.