the Canine Home Companion_________Weekend Edition

the Canine Home Companion Weekend Edition

A spay a day keeps the  Tom cats away!
A spay a day keeps the
Tom cats away!

###editorial rendition

Crazy Cat Lady Memoir to her crazy cat:

Dear Polly Anne,

When I said I needed you…You said, ‘I’ll always stay!’

It wasn’t me Polly, who changed…but you…You and your condescending ways!

No matter, smart ass cat…because now you’ve gone away!

Humans have only one true and effective weapon...the CAT!
Humans have only one true and effective weapon…the CAT!

I sit knitting and collecting dead butterflies but…it all circles back to…

Now you’ve gone. I am left here on my socially unfriended own! Ms. Pissy Pants…you’ve catted ’bout town and I’m left here on my own…Now, Bitch, I can’t watch Ellen…I have to follow your in ‘Heat’ ass! Follow your ‘Holier Than Thou’ scent…And, beg you to come home!

Diva on Demand with a fur coat…You don’t have to say you love me…Just be close at hand! You don’t have to acknowledge I’m in the room…I will understand!

Polly Anne, dear, over the top, Polly Anne, believe me, believe me, I can’t help but spend my misguided love on you! But believe me…I will hunt you down!

Cats...love in dire moderation!
Cats…love in dire moderation!

I’ve been locked out of Facebook and Twitter and left with just a life-size portrait of you and me an a memory! Life seems dead and smells like a used cat box…WTF…What’s the deal? All that’s left is loneliness and there is nothing left to feel!

So, in ending, Ms. I Breed Better, you don’t have to say, you love me. Just let me be a fan! You don’t have to stay forever. I know I’ll never land a man!

Yours in sisterhood, devoted and with your best interests in mind-

Crazy than a Cat on a Tuna Boat Roof/Cat Lady!

Man is the only animal that blushes...Or, needs to! -Mark Twain
Man is the only animal that blushes…Or, needs to!
-Mark Twain

Flirting with the Devil!

###homage to the ugly bulldog!

He kicks off

He does not stride

It is a precarious ride!

He left his leash out in the rain

A puppies pulpit…

No pain, no gain!

To lie down with dogs is to exercise good common sense!
To lie down with dogs is to exercise good common sense!

He keeps the playing field level.

Flirting with the four-legged devil.

the Canine Home Companoin